After a 6 month nap, the adventurers are finally ready to get back to business. After all, killing is their business and business is mediocre at best.
6 months is a long time. Seasons changed and then changed back again. Loved ones grew old and died. Babies were made and born and grew old and died. Their memories were foggy and grew old and died. Their bellies were rumbley. And perhaps most of all, their blades were thirsty. So, like any good band of killers they got their shit together quick and went in search of hot metal.
Marco led the way down the darkened hallways of the frozen crypt, corpse sled in tow. The group came to a door and perceived a faint voice on the other side. The voice claimed to be the Winter Queen, scorned by the Winter King and asked for help. After much discussion, the group decided it would be best to push Marco through the door to scope the situation. Marco was amazed to see a room of rusty steel cages, some with dead bodies in them. Arvo attempted to be diplomatic with the woman, who was badly hurt. However, he knew magick was afoot and exclaimed “there is magick afoot!”
The woman revealed herself to be Azrinda, sister of Zanna whom the group had slayed 6 months prior. Azrinda was not interested in diplomacy, she only wanted the Ice Septer. The cage doors flew open and the corpses seemed to reanimate themselves. A large Owlbear named Hootie sprang from a cell in a dark corner to come to Azrinda’s rescue. Battle ensued and it was not pretty, for it was a mighty battle and blood flowed deep red like the wines in King Ginger III’s Rivera in Fallcrest.
After the group got their murder on, they agreed to be more cautious when entering future rooms. They butchered Hootie and threw the carcass on the corpse sled and proceeded to the next room. This frozen room ended up being part of an army barracks and soldiers lined the walls, all frozen in their tracks. A large Ice Dragon hung from the ceiling in the center of the room. Suddenly, Arvo spotted a shiny key dangling from the neck of the beast and knew it must be his.
He used his Mage Hand to take the key from a distance, but the ice encasing the dragon began to crack and suddenly he was upon them. The dragon had been frozen for some time now and was disoriented and hungry. He revealed himself to be the Winter King’s mount. The group was able to convince him that they were on his side and they were sent by the King to retrieve the Ice Key. They sweetened the deal by letting the hungry dragon feast upon Hootie’s fresh carcass. They quickly left and shut the door and let out a collective sigh of relief. They were not interested in battle with the Dragonborn this day.
They proceeded up a set of stairs and came upon another hallway with multiple doors. Laoghaire, being extremely cocksure and perceptive, strutted down the hallway perceiving all that she could perceive. She settled upon a door that had a draft coming out of it. The group had discovered an ancient Dwarven library. Unfortunately, all of the books were weather damaged. Sifting through the soggy mess on the shelves, Laoghaire came across a Minotaur horn with a cork in it. The horn opened with a “pop” and as she sniffed the liquid (as the Grey Fox had taught her) she deduced that it was the Elixir of the Dragon! She could now roast her enemies flames from her breath like a fine game hen on a spit! Hooray!
Arvo seemed to be getting anxious and prompted the group to move on. In the next room, they found the Tiefling named Anger who wielded the Fire Key. Anger inflamed a couple of skeletons and unleashed a large ogre that was chained to the wall. Laoghaire fell into the cold forge. Arvo stood in the doorway and only used spells when he had a perfect line of sight. Gunther backstabbed and backstabbed some more.Caorawl was able to bide his time behind a stack of barrels, only to unleash his fury at the perfect moment. He sprang from the barrels like “Superfly” Jimmy Snuka, World Champion of the Harkenwald Wrestling Circuit, sprang from the top of the steel cage in his match with The Magnificent Muraco.
After the fight, Arvo picked up the Fire Key and exclaimed “Ouch, you cunt!” The key was hot to the touch so he used his mage key to carry it since he always has an answer to everything. A disagreement over which way to proceed started and there was even discussion of splitting the party for a moment. Caorawl insisted on somersaulting through one door and discovered a guard’s room on the other side with a large frozen gong in it. He tried to somersault through the next door, but it was just too frozen and he bashed his face on the door and flew backwards with a loud yelp. At this point, I believe the group just kicked the door in and found a frozen office-like room.
Arvo was not happy with the lack of booty in these rooms and urged the gang to return to the frozen doors of the Dwarven temple. They agreed and used the Ice and Fire keys to open the doors. A ghost of Dwarven priest stood up from a corpse and bowed to them before disappearing. Suddenly, the group felt orgasmic tremors come over them and all of their healing surges were returned!
The adventurers were not ready to finish the fight. They charged out of the temple and up a nearby set of stairs into a kitchen. They came face to face with a human and 3 Dwarves who were scavenging for food. The Dwares gathered for a whispered conversations, occasionally shooting suspicious looks towards the adventurers. Arvo attempted to reason with them and said that they had been frozen and were merely looking for food also. A Dwarf whispered to the human. The human said the the Dwarves remembered who they had been frozen with and the adventurers had not been there before. Arvo was caught in his dirty, cheap lies once again.
A fight broke out. Caorawl cried as he slayed his brethren. The human turned out to be versed in the ways of magick also and turned Laoghaire into a piglet! She scurried afoot while the rest of the group mounted an offense. Arvo, careful to use his line of sight, launched magic missiles. Gunther backstabbed and bumped AND ran. Caorawl hacked the Dwares to death with is Fire Axe and pushed a female Dwarf down a set of stairs where she tumbled to her death. Caorawl cried some more as he looked at her mangled corpse. Laoghaire returned to form just as the group decided to dispose of the bodies in the large refuse pit. As they got close to the pit, a large and smiley black tentacle sprang from the depths of hell and pulled Laoghaire and Gunther into the pit where they took 1d8 garbage pit damage. It took the rest of the group to pull them free using the rope in their Adventurer’s Kits™.
Bruised, but not broken, they forged on. For final conflict with the Winter King himself was coming…